SAMPLE FIELD GUIDE: ON SELLING SCIENCE TO MAGAZINE EDITORS

by Janice Hopkins Tanne


Magazine science stories begin with a query letter, like this one I wrote to New York Magazine:

Hepatitis B: The Model For AIDS

Hepatitis B is spread by sex, including kissing; blood-to-blood transmission by dirty needles and transfusions, and from mother to infant during pregnancy or birth. And, unlike AIDS, it is also spread by casual contact. Much of our knowledge of AIDS is extrapolated from experience with this similar disease. Hepatitis B is much more infectious than AIDS, but more than half the people who get sick with hepatitis B have no identifiable risk factor: They don't know where they got it or how. Researchers think most of them got it from sexual contact with an apparently healthy person who is an unknowing carrier of the disease...

...The good news is that hepatitis B, unlike AIDS, is totally preventable by a vaccine...

...New York's readers are unaware of this serious, growing, but preventable threat that affects them intimately through their sex partners, exercise clubs, day-care centers, barber and beauty shops, medical providers, and ordinary work-a-day activities. I want to do this story for two reasons. It can help save readers' lives and health. And it hasn't been done. I have never seen an article on this major disease in any consumer magazine, although I have written a state-of-the-art update for doctors...Hepatitis B is too important to ignore and New York could be the first to alert readers. The enclosed Xerox shows you the level of concern at a local medical center.

The proposal was accepted and assigned. The lead of the published article went like this, because I found a moving story to illustrate my scientific tale:

Four months before she died from hepatitis B, a 23-year-old secretary-we'll call her Kathy-had her ears pierced at a jewelry store near her midtown office.

"It was the only risk factor we ever identified. She had no sex partners. She never used IV drugs. She was a healthy young woman," says Dr. Harold Neu, an infectious diseases expert at Columbia-Presbyterian Medical Center and a member of the medical team that fought to save Kathy's life.

About three and a half months after the ear-piercing, Kathy got flulike symptoms and stayed home from work. ... A few days later, she became so sick that she was hospitalized...she slipped into a coma.

"Her liver failed. Her blood wouldn't clot. Despite everything we did, she died within two weeks," Dr. Neu said.

Hepatitis B, the disease that killed Kathy, is the model for AIDS: The patterns of infection of the viruses that cause the two illnesses are very similar. But hepatitis B is at least fifteen times more common than AIDS, and it is far more infectious.

Unlike AIDS, it is entirely preventable by vaccines....

This story, "The Other Plague," appeared in New York Magazine on July 11, 1988 and won a Front Page Award from the Newswomen's Club of New York.

I. Ideas

Where did I get the idea? I had been writing about AIDS for years and I had been struck by the fact that AIDS researchers always commented on hepatitis B as the model for AIDS. I covered an international conference on hepatitis. I was amazed that, although a vaccine was available, few people were immunized. I proposed the story to New York. And I got myself immunized.

As with the hepatitis B story, many stories grow out of previous ones. Write about AIDS and you discover hepatitis B. Cover a scientific conference and you'll see a story for the public.

Sometimes a story that doesn't fly leads to one that does. I had discussions with the Commonwealth Fund about a health story that never worked out, but I learned that the Fund had helped develop the concept of patient-centered care. That story idea proved to be just right for American Health, for whom I interviewed doctors and patients at three different patient-centered care facilities.

One of my major sources of story ideas is journal articles. Usually, they don't suggest a specific story, but they let me know what topics are currently of scientific interest and who the players are.

Conferences can lead to feature stories as well as news articles. For example, I covered a New York Academy of Sciences conference on the threat that health reform posed to academic medical centers for the British Medical Journal. New York City was especially endangered because its many academic health centers were already tightly regulated by the state and strapped for cash. I proposed an article to New York Magazine, stressing the danger to medical care and to the city's economy. The story ran with this headline and deck: "Washington to New York: Drop Dead. We've got the best medical treatment on earth-for now. Health-care reform threatens the city's great teaching hospitals, the crown jewels of the US medical system. Can they be saved?"

The NASW New York Chapter's holiday party provided me with another story idea. The speaker was Dr. Patrick Kelly, head of neurosurgery at New York University Medical Center, who described his work in developing computer-aided stereotactic neurosurgery. That became an article for Parade that got reader response from around the world.

About half my assignments come from editors who present me with an idea for a story. This is more likely to happen when you've written for a magazine for several years or when you're well known in the field. Often these ideas are "in the air" and editors want them covered fast.

Medical center public relations people sometimes offer me exclusives. For example, Columbia-Presbyterian Medical Center in New York gave me (for New York Magazine) the print exclusive about the separation of Siamese twins. The medical center trusted me to present a thoughtful, balanced report and to avoid a media circus that would upset the parents and foster parents. They did not ask for or get any right of review.

Commercial PR people, as opposed to PR people representing medical centers, universities, and professional medical associations, are often dismal as sources of story ideas. They send press releases announcing the Mark III model of their client's toothbrush and then call to ask if you got the press release and are planning to use it. Turn the press release over and recycle it as paper for taking notes.

II. Proposals

All stories begin with a proposal, also called a query letter. The proposal has several parts and aims.

First, it must catch the editor's attention. Writers think, "I'd like to write about genetic testing and counseling." Editors think in headlines, "10 Ways Genetic Testing Can Save Your Life." So, give your proposal a headline. It will help you focus your approach. (See Box, 10 Tips on Query Letters.)

The proposal must also show the editor how you can write. Many of my successful proposals open with the sentences that become my story's lead, or something close to it. For example, my proposal read:

Separated For Life

Carmen and Rosa Taveras are healthy, adorable, curly-haired eight-month old twins, as lively and cute a pair of babies as you'll ever see. They have every prospect of growing up to healthy adulthood. Except that they will never be able to sit, walk, stand, or lead normal lives, because they are Siamese twins joined at the buttocks and sharing parts of the spine and many internal organs...

As printed, the headline and lead were:

Free At Last

When Dr. Peter Altman of Columbia-Presbyterian Medical Center got his first look at Carmen and Rosa Taveras, he saw bright-eyed, wavy-haired 2 1/2-month-old twins-as lively and adorable a pair of babies as he'd ever seen. They had every hope of growing up to be healthy adults-except, without a million dollars' worth of risky, sophisticated, delicate medical treatment, they would never sit, stand, walk, or lead normal lives.

They lay on their backs, Carmen's head pointing toward one end of the examining table, Rosa's pointing toward the other end. They were fused together, pelvis to pelvis.

Next, your proposal must tell the editor where your story will go from here and what it will cover. I said I'd be in the operating room, would describe the surgery, and would interview the family members and the surgeons, covering both technology and emotions.

Then your proposal has to tell why you are the right person to do the story and describe your background. This should take no more than two paragraphs. If I hadn't written for a magazine before, I would describe my expertise and connections, mentioning prizes or significant stories. I'd enclose three of my best clips, ones appropriate to the magazine's style.

Finally, you must explain why this story is important for their readers. For example: It will improve their health or let them avoid a risk. It will bring them up to date on an undiscovered issue of importance to their town or city.

Before you send a proposal, read a few issues of the magazine and discover whether it accepts freelance articles. Some magazines are entirely staff-written. If you can't find the magazine on a newsstand or get the information from sources such as Writers Market (published annually by Writers Digest Books), call the magazine and ask for writers' guidelines and a sample issue.

Submit your proposal. In 1996, this is still done by mail or fax. A few magazines accept modem'd queries.

Now the bad news. Unless the magazine has asked you to submit a proposal and even if you have written for them before, your query will probably be ignored.

When I became a freelance writer 15 years ago, after staff positions, most magazines responded to queries within three weeks, even from unknown writers. Today-and I speak as two-term president of the American Society of Journalists and Authors and former chair of its Contracts Committee-your query is likely to meet dead silence at many magazines.

What can you do? Some writers attach postcards to the proposal, asking the editor to check the status (yes, no, we're thinking about it). If you haven't heard within about three weeks, call. The editor may never have seen your proposal and may ask you to re-submit it.

Since the level of rudeness on the editorial side has escalated dramatically, I see no need for writers to be polite. Multiple queries means that you submit your proposal to several magazines at the same time. I would focus the same idea quite differently for different magazines, but many writers send a generic query letter. Do you tell the magazines it's a multiple query? I wouldn't. If two of them want it, take the highest bidder.

III. The Contract

Write nothing without a contract that specifies what rights the magazine is buying, the amount it will pay and when, and the story length.

Copyright and all rights to your story belong to you unless you license the rights or give them away. You do not have to do anything to claim copyright, although (for articles published in the US) registering your story with the Library of Congress will give you major protection.

In days past, contracts were verbal. Then it was a simple letter: 2,000 words by date X, X pay and X kill fee, First North American Serial Rights.

Lawyers found an employment opportunity when publishers realized they could make money out of electronic uses (databases, on-line services, CD-ROMS and the notorious "media yet to be invented"). Contracts became multi-page affairs, sometimes longer than the story they were commissioning.

Read your contract carefully and understand what the terms mean. Most magazines have at least two contracts (bad, better, best, and for our special friends).

The most desirable contract calls for First North American (often, today, Print) Serial Rights, which means the magazine has the right to print your article once, on paper, in North America. (In Britain, it's first British serial rights.) Contracts should always say that expenses will be covered, although you may need prior approval for major expenses.

Avoid contracts that call for your article to be "work made for hire" (copyright law says such agreements must be signed before the work is started) or contracts that require you to give up your copyright to the publisher. Writers have made big bucks out of movie, reprint, anthology, and other secondary rights.

The electronic age is a new ball game. When your publisher takes all rights (or electronic rights in addition to print rights) and puts your article on a database, everybody makes money except you. The phone company gets money for telephone access. The publisher receives revenue from the database producer and the access provider, such as CompuServe. You get nothing. The money is significant: Forbes magazine estimated the New York Times will make $80 million from electronic uses in the next five years.

Major writers' organizations feel that writers should share in this revenue. Your contract should either specify a flat fee for a limited time for use of your work in a specified manner (X$ for 1 year on X database). Or it should pay you on a fee-plus-royalty arrangement. The Authors Registry, set up by leading writers' organizations, now represents nearly 50,000 writers and writers represented through 90 literary agencies. It provides a method of contacting writers and paying them for electronic and other uses.

Your contract will specify an approximate article length and a fee. Editors talk fee per word-$1 a word is the McDonald's of the industry. Writers should think time per project. How much money do you need to make per day or week? How much time will this project take?

Magazine articles have been getting shorter for years, but you have to do the same amount of research to write 1,200 words as to write 3,000. Consider how much time it will take you and price the assignment accordingly.

Never sign a "pay on publication" contract. That means you write the story "on spec" (on speculation; you hope they'll like it). They won't have to pay you until they run it. That could be next year...or never. Meanwhile, you can't submit it elsewhere.

Never sign a blanket indemnification clause. This says you guarantee that your work won't infringe anyone's rights (including vague concepts like the right to privacy) and that you'll pay for the publisher's lawyers if there is a suit, even an unsuccessful one. If your story has touchy points, a responsible magazine will have its lawyers vet the story before publication at no cost to you. The magazine will also cover you with its publisher's insurance policy and defend the case (with its lawyers) if there is a suit.

If you have written a major story for a US publication and you keep the copyright, file for copyright. Call the Copyright Office for information (202-707-3000) and forms (202-287-9100). Fill out the one-page form and send it in with $20 and two copies of your article within three months of publication. If there's a copyright infringement case, you can get attorney's fees and statutory damages, which can run as high as $100,000. Unless you do this, lawyers are unlikely to take your case because they can only claim actual damages-maybe a few hundred dollars.

IV. Sources

You've done enough research on the story to write the proposal, but not enough to do the article. Now you need to read review articles, perhaps textbooks, and interview the experts.

When I'm doing interviews, I try to start with the least important ones. I don't like to sound dumb and I recall what AIDS expert Anthony Fauci, head of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, said. He said he knew he was in trouble when the reporter asked him to spell virus.

Ask everybody you interview who else you should talk to. Ask them who disagrees with their point of view and interview them.

Call the major medical centers. Their PR/Public Affairs people are usually helpful and know who their experts are.

Call the disease associations and the professional associations (such as the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists).

I read basic journals (The British Medical Journal, The Journal of the American Medical Association, The Lancet, Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report, The New England Journal of Medicine, Science, Science News, The Sciences) so I am usually up to date on current science. I use review articles for background; the references are also useful sources for other experts. It helps when you call someone for an interview to be able to refer to an article they wrote.

Do your interviews in person if all possible. You get more out of them, just from facial expressions and the warmth that comes from being in the same room with somebody. If not, do a phone interview.

Don't call to set up an interview unless you're ready to do the interview. It may be your only chance to talk to the expert.

People have different methods of dealing with interview notes. I tape all my interviews, phone and in person, and I always take notes. I almost never transcribe the tapes. I do listen to the key quotes to make sure they're correct.

VI. Writing and Submission

Writing an article is a process of gathering too much information and winnowing it down. Before I start writing, I go through my notes and highlight the key points and good quotes. Then I re-read the query. Stories sometimes drift away from what you proposed, but what you proposed is what the editor expects. If you're way off, you should have alerted the editor. If you didn't, do
it now.

Writing is not easy. Red Smith, the famous American sports writer is supposed to have said writing was easy: You just sit down at a typewriter and open a vein.

Ease into writing by doing the source list: the names, correct titles, and phone/fax/e-mail numbers of the people you interviewed. The fact-checkers will need it and doing it will refresh your memory.

I usually know the way I'll begin my story and the way I'll end it. Then I fill in the middle. Every once in a while I run into a real bastard of a story-I've never known what causes them. When that happens, I write the individual parts of the story and string them together, like beads on a necklace.

I started on daily newspapers, where you didn't have the luxury of time to write and revise. I learned to do most outlining in my head so I wrote the story right the first time. Daily newspaper or wire service training is unmatched for teaching you to be a professional.

Sometimes you will write in different styles for different magazines. For New York, I write more slangy and hip for savvy New Yorkers, and my readers are about half-and-half men and women. For American Health, I write more plain vanilla for a more middle-America audience, more women than men, and seriously interested in health and nutrition. For the British Medical Journal, I write in a more professional tone for doctors, more men than women, interested in political issues affecting medicine, but less aware of nuances in American society. Some magazines treasure writers' different voices, others try to make them all sound the same.

Writers claim they hate to "dumb down" for the women's magazines, but it can be a rewarding experience to have to really understand complex medical ideas and explain them, rather than just repeating the textbooks and standard wisdom.

Your article will be too long. Try not to be over by more than 10 percent; that's comfortable for both you and the editor.

You will have some clever phrases or anecdotes you love. Kill them before they make your editor gag.

The traditional way to submit a story is double-spaced on white paper with generous margins. Today, many magazines request submission on disk or by modem, but most also want a hard copy (i.e., paper) as well.

The writer should hear whether a story has been accepted within hours to three weeks, depending on urgency and the editor's efficiency. If you haven't heard, it's appropriate to call.

Your editor may want revisions, and the contract should have addressed the point. If you turned in a story that fulfills the outline set out in your proposal, you should not have to do more than one revision. Usually, this should be minor (please interview one more person) or structural (start with the paragraph at the top of page 3).

Editors must be specific. You want to avoid endless rewrites while the editor changes focus or decides what he or she likes.

Kill fees range from about 10 percent to 100 percent. Most are in the range of 25 percent to 35 percent and come into play when all have made their best efforts and the story isn't working. A magazine should pay 100 percent when the writer has fulfilled the contract but the magazine has decided not to run the story because the competition covered the same story the week before or the magazine was so full that week that it didn't have space for your time-sensitive story.

When your article has been accepted and edited, it will probably be fact-checked by a bright young person. Sometimes fact-checkers save you from errors. Provide this person with your printed sources, marked to show what supports what statement, much the way a journal article is referenced. Provide a complete list of names, titles, and phone numbers of people interviewed.

VII. Afterplay: Promotion

Your job isn't done. When your article is published, you need to promote it to make it easier for you to do future articles for this magazine and for others.

Send copies of the article to the people you interviewed and to the people who helped you, such as medical center PR people. You can give your editor or the editor's assistant stick-on labels or you can get your editor to send you copies of the magazine and you do it. Try to include a brief thank-you letter and your business card.

Tell the magazine you're available for reasonable radio and TV interviews. Start small, on local stations, and you'll learn how.

Say thank-you to your editor if he or she did an excellent job. In special circumstances, send a thank-you letter to the editor's boss, with a copy to the editor. Good editing is extremely rare, and thanks for good editing is rarer yet.

Remember that editors cherish good, reliable writers. Now may be the time to chat about ideas for your next proposal to the magazine.

VII. Rewards

Your greatest reward will be the sure knowledge that you helped somebody, perhaps saved a life. I know that I have, and that knowledge is worth every editorial hassle I've ever been through.

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Janice's Ten Tips For Writing A Proposal/Query Letter

1. Give it a headline.

2. Open with what will probably be your lead.

3. Go on for two or three paragraphs, then describe how you'll cover the rest of the story.

4. Include one paragraph each on: Why you are the right person to do the story, your background, and why this story is important for their readers.

5. No more than a page and a half, single-spaced.

6. You have to do enough research to write a convincing query, but not enough to write the story. You should know whom you want to interview, although you may or may not identify all these people in the proposal.

7. You need an angle: low-fat diet for the pregnant woman; low-fat diet for the traveling executive.

8. Include three clips.

9. Read three issues of the magazine before you submit a query.

10. Wait three weeks before calling the editor to ask what happened to your query, unless you specify this is a time-sensitive query.

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Janice Hopkins Tanne is a Contributing Editor at American Health and New York magazines, and is two-term president of the American Society of Journalists and Authors.

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